I love giving advice. So does my friend Alex. We come from different generations and we’re at very different points in our lives and careers. But we share the same philosophy: every door can be unlocked. Every once in a while, we partner up on a special installment of my advice column, Ask Ellen. It’s called… Ask Alex & Ellen. Two hits of advice in one column. We hope you enjoy it!
Dear Alex & Ellen,
I have philosophical question for you (hope that’s OK!)
All throughout my 20’s, I worked part-time as a barista at Starbucks.
Most people would think of that as a “lame” job, but I really loved it. I got to know the local customers, I knew their names (and their kids’ names), I remembered their favorite orders, and a bunch of them brought me presents to celebrate my graduation from college.
All I was doing was steaming milk and slinging espresso, but to me, it was meaningful. I felt like I was part of a community.
Fast forward to today: I’ve got a “real” job working for a non-profit, supposedly “saving the world.” But I just stare at a computer screen in my cubicle all day — and I don’t feel “connected” to my work. In many ways, I miss the simplicity of my barista days — chatting with people face to face, knowing I was serving them something delicious and making their day a little better!
So my big question is:
What is a “meaningful” career, anyway?
And also:
Do you think I should quit my job and start working at Starbucks again? (Just kidding. Except, not really.)
Signed,
Total Existential Crisis
Ellen says:
Dear TEC,
Young people are often told that they have to “change the world.”
Pursue big, fancy careers. Collect hefty paychecks. Do notable, newsworthy things. Be a “hero.” Be a “leader.” Be a “revolutionary.” Make “history.”
But the world can’t run on “revolutionary history-making leaders,” alone.
We also need cupcake bakers, holiday gift-wrappers, hedge-trimmers, bartenders and B&B owners.
You might not (literally) want to work at Starbucks for the rest of your life, but there’s clearly “something” about that position that made you feel happy and fulfilled. Whatever that “something” is, that’s worth exploring and carrying into your next job or career — whatever that may be!
If I had to guess, I’d say that you’re the kind of person who thrives on conversation, community, and connections. You’re good at making people feel at home. Making beautiful things that brighten people’s days. That’s great!
Instead of working at Starbucks, you could take those skills and …
– Open your own cafe, bakery (like these gals!), coffee shop, or catering company.
– Work for a cool company that focuses on food (like this one), pleasure, community, gift-giving or connection ( this company is so lovely!).
– Open a small “home-based business” where you know all of your customers on a first-name basis (like a dog grooming business, a childcare service, massage therapy, something like that). These days, you can even cook and invite friendly strangers over to your place to eat dinner… for a fee, just like a restaurant! (Think: AirBnB but for foodies.)
– Or, keep your current job (or a similar cubicle job) but open a “side business” where you can indulge in work that feels exceptionally meaningful and fun, even if it doesn’t make you tons of money at first. In time, who knows? Your “side hustle” could blossom into your full time gig!
My point here is that “success” doesn’t always come in a “conventional package.” It’s not always about having the corner office, the hefty paycheck, the benefits package, or the “fancy” job title that makes others feel “impressed.”
Success comes in every shape, flavor and form.
Just like you can customize your latte at your local Starbucks (three shots, half sugar, light on the foam, tall, extra hot) you can customize your career so that it’s absolutely dreamy for YOU.
This is your LIFE, after all… and it’s just too darn shot to sip on something that doesn’t taste right.
Alex says:
Dear TEC,
I have an Annual Existential Crisis (I’m overdue for mine this year – guess that means it’s coming up, soon! ha!) so I can completely relate to your angst.
Like you, TEC, I often feel torn between my desire to lead a simple, cheerful life and my desire to “make a difference” in the world.
Much like Ellen, here’s what I’ve come to realize:
“Making a difference” can take many forms.
If you want to make a positive imprint in another human being’s life, you can do that with one email or handwritten note… with one cupcake, baked with love … one history-making speech from a podium in front of the White House… or four simple words whispered to a friend in need: “I believe in you.”
You see, changing someone’s life for the better isn’t always a big, brazen, flashy affair. Often, it’s a very quiet moment, witnessed by only two people, not millions.
So, to all the baristas, bakers, candlestick makers, pre-school teachers, house cleaners, and other people who are working tireless without much fanfare or celebration: you matter, too.
Because you enhance and upgrade people’s lives in so many ways. You are “changing the world,” too, even if you never see your name emblazoned on a plaque in front of city hall.
I suppose I should give you some specific advice, TEC. Here goes…
I vote:
Go ahead and get a job back at Starbucks slinging espresso, if that truly makes you happy. (Or happy… for now!)
Hell, I am writing these words from my local Starbucks right now! It’s practically my second home, I visit every day, and the baristas greet me by name. They always make me feel welcome and I’ve done some of my best work here. My local ‘bucks baristas are consistently enhancing my life… and hundreds of others. I have nothing but the highest esteem for Starbucks baristas!
Every smile, every embrace, every kind word, and good, strong cup of coffee makes a difference in this challenging world.
So, go right ahead:
Change the world in your own quiet way.
And don’t let anybody tell you it’s “wrong.”
Kindness, generosity, passion, artistry, in any form, is never wrong.
Alex & Ellen
Image: Willie Franklin.